I am Samantha from Hong Kong and I arrived in the US with my husband in 2020, and we recently welcomed our two months old son. I am a hardworking person who likes learning new things, traveling, exploring the world, meeting new people, making friends, learning new cultures and food. I love sharing my photos and videos on my Youtube channel, Samantha_travelog (https://youtube.com/c/Samanthatravelog).
When I arrived in Philly, I had no friends and I felt alone. One barrier that I faced a lot was lack of transportation, because with a Hong Kong Driver’s license, I could not drive much in the US and because if I had an accident I would pay more money since they would treat me as an international driver and not a US driver. I arrived in 2020 during a pandemic with no friends, and nowhere to go and I was not even able to shop at malls like King of Prussia because of the pandemic lockdown. My husband told me that the shopping malls were closed and the only place I could go was the park, but considering the hot weather, I stayed home.
When my husband went to work, I would look at the wall, not able to talk to anyone considering the time difference between Hong Kong and the US. This made me feel so alone and all I could do was wait for my husband to come home from work so that we could at least go somewhere during the weekends or holidays.
I also had difficulty understanding privacy in America, where people are not necessarily open to speaking with you. It’s more like “hi” and “bye” to me, like some kind of a slogan. I longed to talk to someone, but I realized that this was now my new reality in the US.
English fluency was another barrier I faced because I had a few years of speaking English in Hong Kong and I spoke Cantonese with my mum, friends and relatives. I realized that I needed to adapt to American English. One time I asked for hot water in a restaurant and they could not understand me until my husband pointed out that the American accent is different from the British accent. I was used to watching British shows and speaking English with a British accent. I decided to learn American English by watching YouTube videos and NBC news with the subtitles, since the speech was fast and the accent was different. My husband encouraged me to watch Netflix but there were times when my husband would laugh at the jokes, and I had no idea of the humor since the cultures are different.
I got connected to Let’s Talk Philly Conversation Circles (LTP) through the free library and by my friend who introduced me to join the circles and though we ended up in different circles, we still enjoyed it. When I was planning to join, I was pregnant and I was not sure if I would be able to commit to attending 80% since I was due in April 2022. I finally decided to try. There were other Moms in the circle and I was so happy to be accepted while dealing with my pregnancy. Being part of the conversation circle was a great chance to speak English because participants were from different countries. It was not just about learning American English, but I had an expectation of meeting new friends, learning about our countries and cultures. “I am lucky to have met Maureen, Madina, Fabiola and Flor because you are my friends in Philly”. It’s not like we could drive to the LTP center, but it was a space where we met facilitators and friends. I was pregnant while in the circle and my baby could hear what I was saying. I kept thinking that it was good for him because he will have to speak English when he begins school.
Being a new Mom is not easy. The baby needs your attention and you become very tired and a lot of flexibility is required. After this 2-month experience, I am so thankful to my husband who didn’t get any income when he took leave from work to care for me and our baby. Without the support of my husband, I would not have been able to be part of LTP. I faced challenges as a new Mom when my baby got a yellowish shade on his face, which later I learnt it was because of lack of breastmilk. I was also depressed with no family and friends to support me since they are in Hong Kong. But thank God with the support of my husband, Madina, Maureen, Arline, I have felt supported a lot with messages like “your baby is so cute”. Hearing that has meant that I can take care of my baby. It has been challenging but I have learnt that if you need people to help you, you need to say something otherwise people will not know how to help you. I was not able to cook since I could not stand for a long time after giving birth.
I am grateful and lucky because friends cooked soup for me and asked my husband to bring it to me and made me feel taken care of with warmth and love. I had previously experienced Americans just saying hi and bye but now with my baby they say “what can help you with”? “Your baby looks so good!”. “I have a car seat; can I help you with it!” I do not know them deeply, but I have met people who took the initiative to help me and I felt loved. Even though our circle is finished, I keep in touch with Maureen, Madina, and Arline who follow my stories on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/samantha__au/. I am grateful to have met them and hope we can meet soon in person. I would recommend that LTP have a Mom’s circle with Mom’s from different countries so that we can support each other through our emotions, feelings, and experiences. Being a mom is a process and every mom has experience and advice to share, especially with other new moms.
LTP helped me develop my skills and potential in life. Maureen and Arline encouraged me to co-facilitate with an opportunity to prepare an English topic with games that helped me develop my skills, potential, enhance my listening and English language skills.
One dream I have is to have another baby and when they are growing up, I would like to educate them myself. I was a preschool and kindergarten teacher in Hong Kong and I hope that I can do that here. I want to help more people to take care of their children and be able to earn a living to support my home and my husband.
Since my son is still small, I will wait a while and maybe in September I will try to be a co-facilitator in LTP because I loved every experience of it. I would describe LTP as supportive no matter where we are from and what skin color we are. You accept us all.
